Some of the best prayers have been when thoughts have come to help me recognize already what I have. Last night was one of those experiences. It was an 'a-ha' moment of learning about the gift of the Holy Ghost. All my life I have tried to be exactly devoted and obedient. I'm definitely not perfect and I make the same mistakes all the time and it becomes so frustrating at time. I think, "am I really growing and changing?" I have to remember that change is a very subtle thing and over time if I consistently do what is right my heart will have better desires and I will see that change.
But about being obedient, I recognize that because I'm trying to live right I know I have the Holy Ghost with me because I know when I don't. I would not know that if I was breaking the commandments or involving me with things that would drive the Spirit away. If that were the case, I would almost become desensitized to the Spirit and become "past feeling". I thought, what a blessing it is to feel the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost because even when I don't always have this burning in my bosom I recognize that the Spirit has not left me. I am constantly trying to invite it in to my life so I may recognize more of when things are not aligned with my Savior's will. That is why the gift of the Holy Ghost is the greatest gift I will ever receive and having it as my constant companion.
If you think about it, some of the greatest decisions I've had to make where I plead for answers have already been answered throughout my life because I've tried to live worthy of those blessings but more importantly because it has brought the gift of the Holy Ghost. It did not take a major revelatory experience to make me understand that the answer was always there. It started the day I got baptized. It started the day I wanted to read my scriptures. It started the day I truly wanted to pray to Heavenly Father.
I'm a bit of a nerd but I read parts of the seminar that was addressed to the new mission presidents. I just soak up every opportunity I can to hear the words of prophets. I didn't read it for the intent of "this will be me someday" but more of "how can I become a better disciple of Jesus Christ?" I loved what Pres. Monson said: "Put your confidence in the Lord. ... If you take the Lord with you, you will find out that His Spirit goes before you." He also said: "My brothers and sisters, you have been hand-selected. You have been chosen from among the most faithful in the Church, and now you have the opportunity to go forth in the Lord’s harvest field." How would it feel to be told by a Prophet of God that you have been chosen from among the most faithful in the Church? That would incredibly humbling. Speaking about being obedient but more of having a change of heart, I love this by Pres. Eyring: “It is not what we have done that matters,” he said. “It is how our hearts have been changed through our faithful obedience. And only God knows that.”
God is good and kind and I'm so grateful that He is and extends mercy to me every day.
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Happy Birthday Austin!!
If you have wondered the last little while why I've had a grin on my face all the time, it's because of this kid and today is his birthday!
So I will give a recap of my story about how we met and just little bits here and there...
-First time I saw Austin was in the Hinckley chapel at Institute the beginning of the semester (for some reason he looked really familiar) but I didn't know who he was but I thought he was pretty cute. I leaned over to my friend to asked if she knew him and she said that he was an usher for devotional in the fall semester. After opening exercises we break into our classrooms and I'm not going to lie, I secretly hoped that he was coming to my class, "Patriarchs of the Old Testament". Yep, I got lucky and he was in my class and he sat right behind me. My plan was for me to turn around and talk to him but I thought to wait until after class. I was totally bummed when he left early. Fail. Epic fail.
-It wasn't until a week or two later that we did introductions in class. He introduced himself as Austin Doutre from Puyallup, Washington and instantly someone asked if he was Nathan's brother and so I had to pipe in and ask if he was Dani's (Mere's old roommate) brother. Bingo! Found a perfect opportunity to talk with him after class. There's always a little linger longer with treats with all the classes afterwards so this was a great time to talk to him. Before I left with my friend, I quickly said hello and asked about an update on Dani's life.
I didn't realize until later but apparently both of us texted our sisters that night and said that we met one another. I guess Dani called Meredith and told her that she had revelation that we needed to get together! (In my mind I'm thinking, "I'm ok with that! :) But after that he didn't show up to Institute for a month! (I still don't let him down about that...)
Finally a month later, the beginning of March, I go to Institute and it just so happens that my good friend couldn't make it that night...I kinda had a hunch that Austin was finally going to be there. (I didn't realize until a few weeks ago that he invited a girl to Institute that same night but she didn't show up either....coincidence?) I didn't see him at first in the chapel but I sat down and then he came soon afterwards and sat next to me and we talked a little bit. We then sat next to each other at class and we walked to the library together afterwards. I then thought, "I'm not going to see him for another week, I got to do something about this" so I quickly invited him to dinner on Sunday with a bunch of people from my home evening group. It was planned that we would go to the CES fireside right afterwards. To Austin, this was a bold move on my part but we just had a lesson about doing something instead of regretting it later so I just did it! And it worked like a charm. Ever since then, it's just been real. good. fun. :)
Moments to laugh about:
-After the CES fireside that first Sunday we took a shortcut to my apartment but that meant trying to maneuver around in a skirt around mud but it didn't turn out so well and I got mud in my toes and white shoes...yep, great first impression.
-Our first date to a concert turned out to be a threesome. Not to mention I was really sick and I was coughing up a lung the ENTIRE time. I was near tears it was hurting so bad. Thankfully he overlooked that :)
-I made it up to him by making a scrumptious, yet fatty salad dinner. I was planning on wearing something nicer than a t-shirt but he was quite early than expected so he was in a suit (because of devotional that afternoon) while I was wearing my in-n-out burger t-shirt that had stains on it. Yeah, super attractive.
-the night we decided we were going to date each other, the previous 2 hours at Institute I got asked on a date and there was no way I could get out of it (long story)
-First time he tried to kiss me on the cheek he kissed my eye! (or so he says)
-Oh and kissing his coat collar is pretty grand too as we found out :) haha
-Our favorite word is an enthusiastic "yes!"
-He nearly gave me a heart attack when he was debating on who to root for on the first football game: Washington State Cougars (ugly maroon color) or the true blue BYU Cougars (fyi: he knew this would get me all up tight, that's why he did it). I nearly had to pace the 2nd floor of the library I was so flustered ;)
Austin is the best guy I know. My computer dashboard is where I keep my sticky notes of things Austin has said to me that I want to remember and my dashboard is pretty much filled to the max. He's so good in so many ways. Thanks Austin for making me a better person! Happy Birthday!
Love,
Julia
So I will give a recap of my story about how we met and just little bits here and there...
-First time I saw Austin was in the Hinckley chapel at Institute the beginning of the semester (for some reason he looked really familiar) but I didn't know who he was but I thought he was pretty cute. I leaned over to my friend to asked if she knew him and she said that he was an usher for devotional in the fall semester. After opening exercises we break into our classrooms and I'm not going to lie, I secretly hoped that he was coming to my class, "Patriarchs of the Old Testament". Yep, I got lucky and he was in my class and he sat right behind me. My plan was for me to turn around and talk to him but I thought to wait until after class. I was totally bummed when he left early. Fail. Epic fail.
-It wasn't until a week or two later that we did introductions in class. He introduced himself as Austin Doutre from Puyallup, Washington and instantly someone asked if he was Nathan's brother and so I had to pipe in and ask if he was Dani's (Mere's old roommate) brother. Bingo! Found a perfect opportunity to talk with him after class. There's always a little linger longer with treats with all the classes afterwards so this was a great time to talk to him. Before I left with my friend, I quickly said hello and asked about an update on Dani's life.
I didn't realize until later but apparently both of us texted our sisters that night and said that we met one another. I guess Dani called Meredith and told her that she had revelation that we needed to get together! (In my mind I'm thinking, "I'm ok with that! :) But after that he didn't show up to Institute for a month! (I still don't let him down about that...)
Finally a month later, the beginning of March, I go to Institute and it just so happens that my good friend couldn't make it that night...I kinda had a hunch that Austin was finally going to be there. (I didn't realize until a few weeks ago that he invited a girl to Institute that same night but she didn't show up either....coincidence?) I didn't see him at first in the chapel but I sat down and then he came soon afterwards and sat next to me and we talked a little bit. We then sat next to each other at class and we walked to the library together afterwards. I then thought, "I'm not going to see him for another week, I got to do something about this" so I quickly invited him to dinner on Sunday with a bunch of people from my home evening group. It was planned that we would go to the CES fireside right afterwards. To Austin, this was a bold move on my part but we just had a lesson about doing something instead of regretting it later so I just did it! And it worked like a charm. Ever since then, it's just been real. good. fun. :)
Moments to laugh about:
-After the CES fireside that first Sunday we took a shortcut to my apartment but that meant trying to maneuver around in a skirt around mud but it didn't turn out so well and I got mud in my toes and white shoes...yep, great first impression.
-Our first date to a concert turned out to be a threesome. Not to mention I was really sick and I was coughing up a lung the ENTIRE time. I was near tears it was hurting so bad. Thankfully he overlooked that :)
-I made it up to him by making a scrumptious, yet fatty salad dinner. I was planning on wearing something nicer than a t-shirt but he was quite early than expected so he was in a suit (because of devotional that afternoon) while I was wearing my in-n-out burger t-shirt that had stains on it. Yeah, super attractive.
-the night we decided we were going to date each other, the previous 2 hours at Institute I got asked on a date and there was no way I could get out of it (long story)
-First time he tried to kiss me on the cheek he kissed my eye! (or so he says)
-Oh and kissing his coat collar is pretty grand too as we found out :) haha
-Our favorite word is an enthusiastic "yes!"
-He nearly gave me a heart attack when he was debating on who to root for on the first football game: Washington State Cougars (ugly maroon color) or the true blue BYU Cougars (fyi: he knew this would get me all up tight, that's why he did it). I nearly had to pace the 2nd floor of the library I was so flustered ;)
Austin is the best guy I know. My computer dashboard is where I keep my sticky notes of things Austin has said to me that I want to remember and my dashboard is pretty much filled to the max. He's so good in so many ways. Thanks Austin for making me a better person! Happy Birthday!
Love,
Julia
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